tough day pt.2

first of all, read the post below this one first!

just so you know, as i write this, there are 2 boys meeting and discussing the word directly in front of me and reading a book by JC Ryle. 2 more from the previous post and 2 behind me. it must be "every cute boy meet and discuss the Word at cambridge" day. hmm. just my luck.

so, i just had a revelation. i am reading Spurgeon's morning. he says...
"There is a fullness of triumph in His ascension, for 'when He ascended up on high, He led captivity captive, and received gifts for men'... Come, believer, and receive largely, for this 'fullness' is inexhaustible, and is treasured up where all the needy may reach it, even in Jesus, Immanuel - God with us."

ok, so i am going to try to word this correctly. what's going through my mind. the devotion comes from the verse, "and of His fullness have all we received." - john 1:16. so, as i see all of these guys who are seeking His Word... i think, these boys are seeking Him. i am impressed with them and want to be with them (partially) because they are seeking Him. they don't have what i want. the Lord hopefully will use them in the lives of women to point women to Him. and hopefully there will be a man one day to do that for me... to guide me and to lead me and to be my partner. but it is all for Christ. and these guys, by sitting and searching the Word are saying, i need Him. i need who He is and what He has to offer. so, i sit here and am thinking... i need Him. i don't need these guys and they don't have what i want. they can't give me this longing that is going on inside of me. that comes from the Lord. He is fullness of all that i need or could ask for or could desire. and my prayer this morning is that i would believe that. that my eyes would not be so focused on what is today... on what may occur on this earth but on my Heavenly Father and how He wants me to point others to Him. praise God for revealing that to me... i will continue to search for His truth.

“God is the ultimate musician. His music transforms your life. The notes of redemption rearrange your heart and restore your life. His songs of forgiveness, grace, reconciliation, truth, hope, sovereignty, and love give you back your humanity and restore your identity.” - paul tripp

“God did not create us to get the cosmic, infinite joy of mutual love and glorification, but to share it. We were to join in the dance. If we center our lives on him, serving him not out of self-interest, but for the sake of who he is, for the sake of his beauty and glory, we will enter the dance and share in the joy and love he lives in. We were designed, then, not just for belief in God in some general way, nor for a vague kind of inspiration or spirituality. We were made to center our lives upon him, to make the purpose and passion of our lives knowing, serving, delighting, and resembling him. This growth in happiness will go on eternally, increasing unimaginably (1 Corinthians 2:7-10).”
- Timothy Keller, The Reason For God

"I don't want to talk about You like You're not in the room
I want to look right at You I want to sing right to You

I believe that You are listening
I believe that You move at the sound of my voice

Give me dove's eyes
Give me undistracted devotion for only You"
- dove's eyes, misty edwards